I thought I should paste this list here, because I wouldn't want my kids to miss out on how cool their mom was....
1. I used to have to wear an eye patch to school, and my mom drew an eye on the top of it to make it look better. I probably scared people.
2. I scratched my best friend's eye, and she had to wear a patch WITH me for a week. I thought that was cool. She didn't.
3. When we used to have those desks that slanted towards us, our teacher rearranged the room so we were facing another classmate. My desk partner puked on my desk, and it rolled down my desk towards me. I escaped just in time.
4. I used to think that I was mentally impaired, and my family just didn't want to tell me.
5. When I was in 8th grade, I transferred to a new school. The teacher asked where I was from, and I said, "I'm from Mars." Well, actually I said, I was from MARNE, but everyone thought I said Mars, and they started calling me Tard. I KNEW IT! ( see #4)
6. I say dumb things to people all the time, like when I asked a former classmate (a guy) what his name used to be or when I told a guy (who was all thankful for the good care the funeral home people gave his wife and who was all teary-eyed that they cared so much to make her look so beautiful), "Oh. Well, that's their job." (see #4)
7. I used to think that I had such long toes because I was gonna be in some big tragic accident that left me with severed hands. I would need my toes to write and draw.
8. I bleached my eyebrows gone once when I decided that Hydrogen Peroxide would be a good thing to clean my face with. I didn't realize my eyebrows were gone until people started asking about them. (see #4)
9. I have to pluck my nose hairs all the time.
10. Someone asked me if my kid was my grandkid just a few months ago.
11. Someone asked me if my sister was older or younger than me. She's TWELVE years older than me, darn it all!
12. I got in an accident once, when I first got my license, and we weren't sure if the noise was our car being crashed or if our music was just up too loud. (see #4)
13. Then, I drove away from the accident, because I didn't know you needed to stop. (see #4)
14. Someone chased us down.
15. I'm doing this stupid list instead of doing my homework.
16. I've been in seminary for SEVEN years.
17. I still have two more years to go. One class per semester...
18. I hope I can use my degree some day.
19. My kids all look more like my sister-in-law than me.
20. When I go away with her, people automatically ask HER if they are twins, how old they are, and what their names are.
21. When I first got married, K took a big ol' bite of uncooked rice, because I followed the recipe, and it said, "Serve over rice". It didn't say "cook the rice first"! (see #4)
22. I haven't improved much.
23. My kids have eaten candy every day since Halloween. The other day, they ate a popcorn ball, a sucker, and Kool-aid for dinner. (That's really true, Cind!) :)
24. I'm done. No more Random Things. I've got to go play "Knock Over the Other Person's Army Guys" with B.
25. Okay, one more. I have scars all over the place. Most of them are from when I tried to show off for a cute guy by pedaling my bike really fast down a steep paved driveway that curved at the end. (I fell, sliding on my knees, hands, and face.) The other ones (the ones on my hands) are from getting bitten by Alroy, my favorite biting human ever. He lived in the group home I used to work at.
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