Bitten

So, I'll tell you this story, but you have to promise not to laugh at how amazingly cheap I am.
You will learn, in the next 10 seconds or so, that I not only feed my kids bologna sandwiches (99c/lb), but I also (apparently and surprisingly, even to me) reuse bologna sandwiches.

Shut up.

S did not finish her sandwich.

She did what she does: she nibbled the "meat" that hangs outside of the bread, bit into the bread a few times (only because she needs to comply to the "try everything" rule) and then walked away.

As she walked away, B asked for another sandwich.

I couldn't help but look opportunity in the eye, as I lifted S's plate from the table.

All sneaky-like, I mayo-ed more bread, placed the (almost-wasted!) piece of bologna under a slice of cheese, and presented the ala-new creation to B.

I began to wash dishes when I heard, in the most mono-tone voice ever uttered from B's mouth, "Not eatin' it."

And I was astonished! (And trying not to laugh, of course.)

"Why!? You wanted another sandwich, didn't you?"

And with no words at all, B lifts the top piece of bread, and then slowly and carefully traces very defined bite marks around the outside circle of the "meat".

After he has finished tracing the perimeter of the bitten circle, he offers one, simple word:

"Bites."

And I die laughing.

And he does not see the humor.



The boy did decide that he really wasn't that hungry after all, and he slipped off his chair to go play.

I spent a few more moments placing the bologna re-sandwich in a baggie (probably a washed, reused one) and storing it in the fridge for later. (I'm kidding. I really did throw it away.)